I want to start this blog off by praising God for fulfilling the desire of my heart because I know He did not have to.
If you read
God's Timing you will get a little bit more of the background story...
We had been trying for over a year to "get pregnant"... that sounds so weird, but that's what we were trying to do! After a miscarriage and several months of trying we found out from the doctor that it may be more difficult for us to get pregnant than for the average couple and would probably take us longer on our own. After a few more months I set up an appointment with a fertility specialist... Only people who struggle with conception will understand the excitement and disappointment that comes with resorting to this option. Now, my cycles aren't like clockwork like they are for some people, so I usually just have to wait... and wait... and wait... and wait to find out I'm not pregnant each and every cycle. About a month before the appointment I felt the urge to take a pregnancy test. I told myself that it was just to confirm that I wasn't pregnant {because I thought we missed "the time" because of camp} and that my period would be coming soon. I decided I would wait just a few more days so I wouldn't waste a test. So I waited all week... and then I waited during the weekend. I just kept having this tug that I should take a test so on Sunday {two days before school started} I went to take a test before my shower. Here is part of my journal entry that day:
"YAY!!!!!! I took a test this morning thinking it would be negative, just to see if my period would be coming soon {for various reasons}... but it was positive!
I sat the test down on the counter and watched as the color crossed the screen. Quickly a dark line appeared and I thought "that's weird, the test line is usually on the other side of the screen" then it kept going and a faint second line appeared {this was actually the test line}. Then I thought "wow that's positive... that's really really really positive! why did I wait so long to test?!" After a minute of processing everything I started to cry. I tried to compose myself. That didn't work.
A few minutes later I decided to wake up Anthony and tell him. So I walk into the room crying, turn on the light and say, "I'm not sad. I'm really excited" then I flop down and show him the test {crying} and tell him how happy I am... and I AM SOOOO HAPPY!!!!"
I was such an emotional mess that morning before church. {which if you know me is actually really surprising}. I was just so overwhelmed by excitement and shock and fear and more excitement.
When asked why I took the test... I really had no good reason. It was the Holy Spirit's leading.
With this great news I was super excited to start my new teaching career... but also concerned about what my co-workers would think about me getting pregnant my first year of teaching. Oops!
This is the story of our baby: the biggest surprise I've ever expected!
